Have I been weak in my life?

Sometimes I find it impossible to continue on in the work that I do. Can I really persevere through the cocktail of pain, abuse, addiction, and mental health issues that these women struggle with daily? It makes me think, have I been weak in my life? I can barely keep myself afloat just trying to help these women amidst the difficulties they face, and I'm not the one faced with any of these problems myself. Sure, I have gone through my ups and downs in life like anyone else. But at the end of the day, the kind of love and support that I come home to...how can I complain? I ponder...am I too sensitive...what do I have to offer with the relatively "easy" life that I have led...I can't relate to this kind of suffering...I am at the end of myself. I guess that's an adequate place to be.

This journey has been arduous. I will endure.

Memorial Day Events

Mark and I were originally planning on going away to Palm Springs with a bunch of friends for the Memorial Day weekend. Since we have been gone virtually every weekend this month we opted to stay at home and plant our garden (finally). We planted carrots, onions and eggplant. Next weekend we plan on finishing our garden and planting tomatoes, peas, corn, lettuce, spinach and a bunch of other veggies. Mmmm, I can't wait to go in my back yard and find everything that I need to create a yummy meal.

Camping at San Onofre

Decisions

Sometimes I just wish that decisions could be made for me. I seem to over-analyze, foreshadow, think and rethink, until I feel sick to my stomach. No matter how much thinking that I do, I still am faced with making a choice, which will inevitably change my course in some way or another.
I guess my fear is making "the wrong choice," but maybe it's not so black and white, but maybe it is?!?!
Just a little outward reflecting.
What are your thoughts on decisions?

Easter Weekend

We spent Easter at my In-laws this year and my sister joined us. We had a wonderful time eating great food and had good enough weather to sun bathe pool side. Nola even got to sport her Easter dress (don't be too alarmed, I promise that my dog doesn't usually wear clothes...it was mostly a joke...mostly:)

?

How do I keep my heart pure whilst being exposed to so much evil and sadness in the world? How do I comfort and love (the women I work with) when I see the pure hell they have lived through? How can I keep faith that these things will be redeemed? How do I let go and let God? My struggle has been taking these words and truths and not only living, but beliving them.

Laguna

(I hope that you enjoy the awkward close-up of Mark and I. That's what happens when there is only two people, unless you want to annoy a stranger by asking them to snap a shot.)

It looks like I'm choking my dog, I swear, I'm not, just trying to hold up her humongous head

Mark and I took Nola to Laguna last weekend. We got breakfast at our favorite Vegan restaurant and played on the beach with Nola. It was the perfect Saturday morning. I can't wait for more sunny days to come.

Anyways, I hope to post more then pictures soon...rantings to come...